The Cloven Hoof, Issue 128

The Cloven Hoof

Issue 128

Generation 666

I credit that phrase to Del James who interviewed Church of Satan Priest Marilyn Manson last October for Rip magazine, applying "Generation 666" to mean the newest generation, the best of whom we would recognize as Satanists. Anton La Vey is the Rotwang behind what Adam Parfrey calls the "shadow purpose" underlying today's trends-in Satanic Witch fashions: in integrating orchestral, bombastic music into modem music; in films; in car and building design; in politics and law enforcement: and in the sciences. This generation now on the rise consists of Doctor La.Vey's children. They've grown up in a post-1966 world and are getting old enough to produce television shows, run businesses, design software, clothing and automobiles, applying Satanic aesthetics. They're quick-witted, resourceful, disdainful of drugs and other crutches, and often express their deep-seated fe~li~gs of anger and frustration through deftly mc1sive parody. Satan truly walks the Earth. Our influence will become more and more apparent in the coming decades.

One of the main articles in this issue explores "Thirteen Eugenic and Environmental Departures Toward a New Satanic Ethnic". We're raising real generational Satanists for the first time in history. How will we find mates, interact as families, raise children and live within a society antithetical to most of our values? How will we school our kids, what will we teach them, how much should we indoctrinate them into our religion? Is what we practice a religion or a philosophy? And why is it that we should be concerned that others might feel nervous about us "indoctrinating" our children into Satanism from a young age? Other religions would consider . ceremonial involvement from an early age vital and necessary. There will eventually be a need for Satanic "youth groups" to guide bright young minds. We have Just as much right to expose our children to our values and practices as any other religion does. Dr. La.Vey set the pace with the first Satanic baptism in 1967. But how we involve our children is quite another matter. Unlike other religions based on fluff and fear, our religion is based on rationality and the power of the human imagination. In emphasizing both aspects of human nature for your child-mind and soul-instead of force-feeding them with dogma, we lay the ground work for a new breed of human. We're not encouraging our young people to "believe" in Satan. It's more important that they can THINK, independent of dogma and dictates.

Our potential is staggering and our destiny is inevitable. This new generation, and their children, realize that Anton La Vey did something truly revolutionary. When people read The Satanic Bible for the first time, they see that Satanism isn't sticking ice picks into puppies, throwing up onstage and gouging the eyes out of aborted fetuses. He didn't Just take the easy route-break all ten commandments and you'll be a certified Satanist. Nope. He was honest, angry, naive in a way, and worked to create something cohesive, something to stand for the next few thousand years, until something better comes along. He did something really dangerous. He let the Devil define himself rather than sticking to the "rules" written by his enemies. All we have to do is reinforce and further codify, clarify and apply what Dr. La.Vey's already done. From now on, wherever there are humans, there will be Satanists, as long as humans exist. Wherever there are frontiers left to explore, Satanists will be there.

Also in this issue we are treated to a few excellent articles from our High Priest. One is on the true secret behind why witches wear those ridiculously high heels. He provides some surprising culinary tips. which you'll no doubt be able to apply over the summer. Dr. LaVey also analyzes the current S/M, Band D, leather-andpiercings scene with an expectedly jaundiced eye. He expounds on his concepts of ECI therapy, and answers the "Jewish question", all in one actionpacked issue.

We're playing catch-up with reviews and resources since we didn't include any in the last issue. We don't accept advertising-at this point but there are many interesting catalogues out there that Satanists might find intriguing so we're passing their addresses along to you. If you run across anything we should know about, be sure to send it along. We count on our readers to keep us informed of worthy resources and publications that other Satanists would be interested in.

I regret that this issue took so long to get out. I'll offer you my sincere apologies but not hollow excuses. Our computer didn't crash and my dog didn't eat my homework. True to Satanic form, I grew ambitious. The issues got bigger and bigger-and less frequent. I'll shorten the format and plow ahead. All subscriptions will be honored; we're changing to an 8-issue subscription rather than yearly, so don't send money if you subscribed last September. You have a number of issues coming to you. The number of the last issue you'll receive should appear on your mailing label. Resubscribe after you get that one.

Until next time (which will be considerably sooner than it was this time), keep your powder dry.

-BJanche Barton, ed.

Hoot Beat - News that Satanists should know

-With the new VRML browsers, we're that much closer to total environments. Several online services are already offering a new form of interactive interface in which, as an "avatar" (onscreen representative of your own choosing), you interact with others in a township environment, going into storefronts to make purchases, read material and transact other business on-line. You can chat with others you meet on the street since they are also represented by avatars-looking like flying fish, necrotic wombats or plain old human beings. Cybersocieties and communities are already forming, putting a new wrinkle in political and social interaction. Get a (virtual) life!

-HOTCHA. l'll bet the Wiccans are steamed at the new movie called The Craft that depicts girls using magic to GET REVENGE. A flurry of protests are probably being aimed at Columbia Pictures. "Three-fold law", "And it harm none", HAHi People want the same things from magic they've always wanted. They should use it proudly and not apologize or feel guilty for accomplishing their goals. Some people just can't take one foot off the safety island. Mr. and Mrs. Joe Palooka America understand magic more than these pale Pagans ever will.

-The Satanic Rituals by Anton La Vey is out in a new paperback edition. The cover is black with red printing, to better complement the black with white printing of The Satanic Bible. Both books continue to sell. 27 years in print continuously for the Bible, published as an original paperback-that must be some sort of record when most paperbacks are jerked off the shelves before the ink on their splashy promotional posters dry. If you want to impress your friends with your feats of prognostication, just look in the pages of The Satanic Rituals and everyone will be doin' it, doin' it in another 10 years. Guaranteed.

-The Village Voice was kind enough to plug The Satanic Bible in a recent promo for their magazine. It's pleasant to become proverbial.

-Satan in the Soap Operas. Is all that stuff about demon possession and diabolical memories I heard about still going on in the soap operas? What are they trying to do?, convert Generation 666 to television?

-The new Johnson Smith Company catalogue (4514 19th Street Court East, P.O. Box 25500, Dept. 666, Bradenton, FL, 34206-5500), Museum Replica catalogue (2143 Gees Mill Road, Box 840, Conyers, GA, 30207), and Pyramid Collection catalogue (Post Office Box 3333, Altid Park, Chelmsford, MA, 01824-0933), among others are responding to the burgeoning Satanic/pagan market by offering more dark, magical items. Mainstream suppliers are growing increasingly friendly to new Satanic/New Age $$-now how about some attractive inverted pentagrams for sale?

-There are more and more books and television shows out now denouncing the debacle of the Satanic hysteria which peaked about 5 years ago. Major publishers and networks have released analyses of the horror that was created in the lives of parents and grandparents who were falsely accused of NSatanic ritual abuse". Now revealed are the tales of children yanked from their beds in the middle of the night by government agencies under accusations of impending Satanic sacrifices; parents imprisoned and stripped of their homes to pay for lawyers fees, counseling sessions and civil court judgments; Christians "exorcising" and attacking grown women, trying to get them to regress and heal their inner child who was Satanically abused. Most importantly, we see the real motivation was, as always, money. Counselors were bilking insurance companies for literally millions of dollars. It was the insurance companies who finally investigated and helped put an end to the madness-because they were losing too much money! These nightmares are far worse than what the hysterics told on Geraldo and Oprah because these nightmares really happened. Now tell me, please-why hasn't anyone sued the shit out of any of these talkshow hosts who were spreading these lies and fanning the flames of hysteria? All of these injustices- pain, ruined lives, in some cases deaths of animals and others-should be thrown right at their feet like so many carcasses.

-They're here! They're hot! They're in Swedish! The new Swedish translation of The Satanic Bible is now available from: Looking Glass Press, Post Office Box 8105, S-104 20, Stockholm, SWEDEN. It's a terrific edition; we'll be reviewing it more extensively in the next issue. Incidentally, if you run across any official or bootleg translations of Dr. LaVey's work send it to this address. The father's always the last to know. It's also important to alert us if you see anyone downloading Dr. LaVey's books on-line. These are not public-domain literary properties and it is in serious violation of copyright laws to overstep Avon Books' and Feral House's rights to these texts.

-Just so you can say you heard it from the horse's mouth, Dr. La Vey is not now nor does he intend to be in the near future on any computer board, newsgroup or chat room-so don't be fooled. We've heard of at least four different impostors claiming to either be Anton La Vey or to be channeling Anton LaVey. He's making it very simple: it will indeed be a cold day Down Below when Anton La Vey logs on. He has every faith in his adherents to clear up misinformation when it occurs in the electronic aethers.

-If you haven't looked at it lately, pick up a copy of Weekly World News. They've finally caught ! on and have tacitly agreed to get in on the joke by becoming a great self-parody. Those readers who are astute enough to appreciate it can delight in the extreme silliness; those who still think these tabloids tell anything remotely relating to the truth can get the wildest, and therefore the TRUEST tales from the Weekly World News-escaped aliens running amok, three-legged race discovered, Satan appearing in billowing explosive clouds (a la The Car). Truly thought-provoking material.

-'Feral House has just published DEATHSCENES, the book based on the video Dr. LaVey narrated. The book includes a perceptive introduction by Katherine Dunn (who wrote Geek Love) and includes death photos far more graphic and disturbing than have ever been published before. It promises to be extremely provocative and will no doubt have brisk reviews and sales so order your copy from Feral House today. Send SASE for ordering information to Feral House, Post Office Box 3466, Portland, OR, 97208-3466. Visit their Website at www.buzzcut.com/central/ feralhouse or e-mail for information: feralhouse@ aol.com.

-Also just out is the new Church of Satan recruitment poster by COOP, which we mentioned in our last issue. We'll probably be using it for an upcoming cover but if you just can't wait to see it, a black and white version appears on the inside back cover. Send for ordering information from: TILT Poster Distributing, 1441 Grant Avenue, San Francisco, CA, 94133.

-Guess who's running for mayor of Bucharest and why should you care? Ilie Nastase-that Roumanian foul-mouthed bad boy ex-tennis star-wants to clean up the unsavory capital city. When asked what politicians he most admired, he said, "Mitterand, Reagan and Dracula." He considers Vlad the Impaler a strong law-and-order role mod~l. "He was a good man." Nastase has been quoted as saying. "We could use a bit of impaling around here."

-Our favorite undercover Christian, Bob Larson, just did some extensive interviews with a few of our officials. The material will be airing on his new cable show over a number of weeks. Bob has been entertaining us with his Satanic hysteria antics for a number of years, but Dr. La Vey is getting to the point where he feels he should be charging Larson a percentage of all the loot he's collecting to save people from the Satanists. "Bob Larson is the ninth Satanic statement personified. I'm getting pretty tired of being used by him." Bob, what would you do without us?

-Big Brother is going to protect our children from online smut with the proposed Vchip. Other suspicious "protections" and conveniences are also slithering over the horizon. A communication device that will remain with you everywhere you go, for example. You'll even be able to keep the same "phone" number (satellite equivalent thereo0 from the time you first hook up until your death, no matter where you move. There's also talk of a computer chip to be required in all new cars so that, in case your car is stolen or you're lost (i.e., in case Big Brother wants to track your travel habits or know exactly where you are at any given time), you'll be able to be tracked by a satellite surveillance network. Can subcutaneous "protection" chips, implanted at birth, be far behind? We already have them available for our pets. How about that wonderful new feature on some phone answering machines that allows you to punch in a code and listen in on what's going on at your house. Without the phone even being off the hook, it picks up sounds and conversation in the immediate vicinity of the phone. Now isn't that helpful? In the old days they used to have to break into your house if they wanted to plant a bug-very inconvenient. Debit cards (like ATM cards) mean you don't have to worry that your cash will be stolen away by street marauders. It also ensures that each penny you spend will be traceable and accountable. Advertising tells us we should love banking in our underwear, right from our home computers. We should love transacting all kinds of business through our computers since we can do it while we're completely naked. They're not kidding.

Since summertime ls Inevitably a time for outdoor socialization, family reunions and barbecues, Dr. LaVey felt our readers would benefit from his vast experience concerning a topic we all relish.· Well, some of us do, anyway. Some of us prefer ketchup and/or mustard. We all know that our IDgb. Priest ls an erudite, eclectic fellow but little did I realize the extent of his culinary expertise. Impress yom relatives when you step up to the grill and make sure you credit Dr. LaVey for your Impressive technique. Black cape, optional.

HASH HOUSE SECRETS REVEALED or THE HIGH PRIEST'S BEANERY GRIMORIE

by Antone Lavey

First off, let me begin by telling you that what I'm about to divulge isn't just for your average reader, but one who is deadly serious about learning the ancient art of fry cooking. Having, in my younger days, spent many successful years working in eating establishments of the sort which flurished during and after the Great Depression, I am in a unique position to instruct on certain teckniques of cqoking ingidinous to Diners, Hash Houses, Beanerys, and Lunch Wagons.

Unfortunately, most of today's so-called men are not nor never could be good fry cooks and when I say fry cooks, I don't mean the assembly line type of kid who works at MacDonalds. If you think this is going to prepare you for that kind of career, you are full of shit and better look elsewhere. These secrets are not your college boy temporary job fast food crap, but genuine career Diner chef fry cook White Cunt Cap serious business. My hambugers were known far and wide and now that I am doing other things, I'd like to see some of my tricks and teckniques carried on by others. So first off, we'll start with the Perfect Hambuger (actually a cheesebuger) .

THE PERFECT HAMBUGER

First get a wad of good ground beef as lean as you can afford. It should weigh in at about a third of a lb. Remember that leaner is better because it only takes so much grease to cook a harnbuger regardless of flavor which we'll get to in a few minutes. Form and shape the buger so it's not too thick and will come just about right smart to the edge of the bun. If it's too floppy and flat and hangs over the bun it's too big. If it's too chubby and round it will have too much bun around it, be too dry, and feel and taste very unprofessional, like a woman usually makes hambugers and that's why their kids prefer to eat theirs out. There is something you can always tell about a woman's hambugers. Maybe their hands just ain't strong enough to mash them flat. I imagine Froid would know.Women may be excellent family cooks, but they never seem to master the Mysteries of Fry Cooking. Even the female hash slingers of yore couldn't fry cook worth sour owl shit, let alone soda jerk or slice an even piece of pie. But getting back to the perfect hambuger; use a girddle or fry pan, preferably iron. I don't have to tell you the correct tempurature setting other than standard Hash House. Slap the raw buger on the griddle. NOW HERE'S THE SECRET #1. Don't salt it first. The meat already contains its natural salts and as you will see, we will be adding more. If the finished product isn't salty enough for the customer he can lay on the salt, mustard, catsup, etc. until it pleases his plate. Most fry cooks automatically reach for the salt shaker like a Chinaman reaches for the MSG. DON'T.

Pretty soon you will have plenty of natural oil under and around the buger and it will be sizzling like a buger should. Every so often, give the buger a squeeze with your spatula to press out and sweep away the excess oil that oozes forth. DON'T ADD OIL, whatever your shanty mama did. As you will see, it will spoil the effect. Some of the old-timers felt the more oil the better and they were pouring on crankcase drainings that hadn't been changed in 80,000 miles. Even when they fried bacon and eggs. If you grew up liking that rancid taste, more power to your big fat ass, but this recipe is MY way and I never had any complaints. In fact, when I occasionally moved on to other establishments, customers would always complain "Earl's bugers just don't have the same taste as old Antone's."

Now here's the BIG secret: after you have started toasting the bun halves {on the griddle, of course) and the buger has been cooked on both sides, place a pat of BUTTER on top, let it melt in real fast, flip the buger over and let it set for a few seconds in the melted butter, THEN drop your slice of real American CHEESE. I don't mean the handy wrapped "Cheese food"-- this is important because in the old days American Cheese was real cheese and not the ersatz gummy stuff that they use in fast food joints. The combination of the BUTTER and REAL American cheese imparts a special quality to the buger that can not be beat. To melt the cheese FAST, drop a lid down on top of the whole thing for a few seconds, slide your spatula under, and place the buger on the toasted bun. Then, put your {cold) iceberg lettuce and beefsteak tomato slice {and raw onion, if you want to attract the ladies) on TOP of the melty cheese, topped by the upper bun. If desired, add catsup, mayo, powdered sugar, turd {musturd, custurd, or you, you big shit), or whatever, and ENJOY {smile).

Bet you never knew I was a fry cook, as well as a High Priest. But as I always say, "If you can do one thing well, you can do many." Rennasonse, man!

"There are more old Fry Cooks who could be fine Satanic High Priests, than Satanic High Priests who can cook a good hambuger."

-Benjamin Disraeli, as quoted by Queen Victoria to the Viceroy of India.

Letters to the Devil

Despite our best intentions in devising this column, judging from letters addressed to "Letters to the Devil" it doesn't seem that Satanists have any burning questions regarding ritual magic, or even forms of Lesser Magic. I'm happy to report that I've received no requests for the proper curse to place on a wayward boyfriend ("I don't really want to hurt him that much, just a little bit so he'll come back to me!") or for the exact ingredients for Wolfbane Stew. Instead, here are some interesting letters we've received since our last installment.

>>>Many of our readers were clearly perplexed by the editorial exchange we arranged with the highly-esteemed Plotzville Times, excerpts of which graced our last issue and will no doubt return in future issues. But others clearly were enthused about this fascinating berg and were quick to jump into the fray. As example witness the letter below, addressed to the Plotzville Times:

Dear Sirs:

Although this is indeed a small town and news of my particular mishap has surely reached you already (probably with photos, too, damn that child), I felt I should write in and "confess" as your paper seems sympathetic to this type of calamity.

Of course, I am referring to the festivities of last Saturday night. The resort at. which we were staying provided a bus to take us to the party facility and then return us to our hotel at festivities' end. Both my husband and I had taken liberal advantage of the open bar (how uncharacteristic!), but we were pikers compared to those persons inhabiting the rest of the bus. Speaking only for myself, much vodka and cranberry was consumed, and, as one might expect, my judgment was, well, impaired when I boarded the bus without enjoying the obvious benefits afforded by a simple anticipatory trip to the loo.

The hotel was more than 30 miles from the venue, and the bus was full of ne'er-do-wells who immediately cranked the classic rock to a staggering volume and proceeded to roll, smoke and circulate many marijuana cigarettes. We, of course, refrained. Unfortunately, however, we had little choice in the matter, since ours was the only open window and the bus soon filled with smoke.

Soon I was feeling remorse about the bathroom. I hoped for the best and tried to relax, but knew it would be a long trip back. The party mood escalated, as did my levels of discomfort.

It became apparent I was in some danger about halfway through the Journey. I shifted and squirmed in my seat, and tried to imagine the last time I had "an accident". I knew If I could just hang on that we would be at the hotel presently. We were not. I tried to imagine seeing public restrooms down on the :8rst level by the pool, but could not recall seeing any. My companion, aware of my predicament, gave encouragement, but really, what could he be expected to do?

I don't suppose I need to say what happened next. Indeed, the bus did (after about a century) arrive. As it slowed to a stop, one of the weekend's sponsors got up and began a little drunken thankyou speech to the driver. I shoved him out of the way, saying, "Look, I've got to pee!" and my young man and I escaped the bus.

We ran for the elevators and got one immediately. We pushed the button for our 0.oor and the doors closed. Alone in the elevator, I crossed my legs hard and hyperventilated while my sweetheart implored me to hang on, that he would run ahead and open the room door for me. The elevator doors opened and he kept his word, dashing down the hall ahead of me.

If I had doubts I would make it during the bus ride, these doubts were redoubled in the elevator, and as soon as the doors opened and it was time for me to run down the hallway, I knew I could no longer fight the inevitable. As I ran, I felt the hot urine pass through my thin panties, splash my thighs, then run into my stockings, leaving a trail of droplets on the carpet behind me which continued onto the carpet of our room and up to the bathroom, where I finally landed.

What an odd feeling to sit on the toilet and continue peeing, fully dressed (I did lift my skirt, but saw no need to bother with the rest), laughing like a deranged pervert. Haw!

Amused by the affair, my darling's sole comment: "Well, at least you'll have a good story for (the editor of the Plotzville Times)." And that I do.

Take care, be well, remember to go before the bus leaves,and

HAlL SATAN!

(Name withheld to protect the guilty)

On a similar note, we also received this submission:

To the Editor, Plotzville Times:

I was recently enjoying the latest edition of your fine publication when it occurred to me that your correspondents, and perhaps you yourself, dear Editor, have a penchant for over-using the term, "Your Big Fat Ass".

Those of us who have, as Mother used to say, "something comfortable to sit on", might get the idea that your paper has something against over-endowment of the tushy-area.

Now my hubby Moishe is telling me not to bother you nice people with this sort of thing, and to get my Bee-hind back to bed, but Ijust thought you should know that some of us are quite happy with our Big Fat Asses, thank you very much!

Very truly yours,

Mrs. Ingrid Brupp

Morning Glory Circle

Plotzvllle

>>>This was too appealing not to pass along to our faithful readers who are always interested in a good guffaw. For about two years now, we've had the address of the American Tarantula Society listed on our Satanic Source Sheet, which is included in our general information packet to answer inquiries about the Church of Satan. Evidently the leader of that esteemed organization took offense at his inclusion there:

To Whom it May Concern:

The ATS is an educational organization that publishes a magazine for the general public and a scientific journal. We have absolutely nothing to do with any religious or political activities. We would appreciate it if you would stop mentioning us in your literature. How anyone could possibly connect your activities with spiders is totally beyond our comprehension.

If any of your members are interested in the science of arachnids, care in captivity, biology, ecology, and so on, then we'd be happy to have them as members. We don't discriminate against anyone or any group. However, letters from your members have almost exclusively dealt with "rituals", etc., something we know nothing about, nor ever will, and they are completely wasting their time and postage. These letters are never answered.

I'd appreciate your cooperation.

Sincerely, Robert G. Breene, m, Ph.D., Arachnologist, Entomologist, Ecologist

To which we replied:

Dear Dr. Breene:

The tone of your letter is insulting and presupposes a lot about our religion and practices that are erroneous, obviously gleaned more from hysterical talk shows than from reading our literature. As you will see from our enclosed literature, if you will be so kind as to READ it before you throw it in the trash, your organization is placed alongside the primary bat conservation advocates-Bat Conservation International, also based in Texas-because bats, like sharks, reptiles, and other creatures are often misunderstood and vilified by mainstream society. Just as Satanists often are by people who choose not to learn the truth, even though our literature is in every major bookstore. If there is a religious tie-in, I suppose that would be it-unfounded misunderstanding and hostility. The founder of our organization, Anton La.Vey, was keeping and responsibly caring for tarantulas back in the 1950's. (Ironically, he is also a great admirer and archivist of a namesake of yours, Bobby Breen, who was an acclaimed child singing star of the '30's.) Satanists are, by nature, drawn to things that are unusual and underappreciated, that often includes tending to have unusual pets. As Dr. La Vey makes very clear in The Satanic Bible, Satanists love and respect animals, far more than we do most humans.

I thought I was doing you a favor. When I first learned of your organization over two years ago, 1 was thrilled that such a society existed to educate people about the beauty of and proper care for tarantulas. 1 wanted to steer people to an address through which they could find out more about these fascinating, tenacious creatures. We have had your address on our Source Sheet for two years now. Our information packets are sent to thousands of people around the world and 1 thought you would appreciate the exposure. You've probably had several dozen inquiries from Satanists who didn't mention anything about "ritualistic tarantula abuse" in their letters-we don't all have fangs and Satanic insignias on our letterheads.

Obviously, your address will be removed from our mailings immediately and we will hereafter discourage people from aligning themselves with you so that they won't suffer from the obvious religious discrimination you harbor toward us.

Most sincerely, BB

Some of our people have really made headway applying Dr. LaVey's theories regarding ECI in a therapeutic sense. The term ECI to describe the phenomenon Dr. LaVey described in The Satanic Witch has already seeped into the culture, much the way "psychic vampire" has. We've heard that a sociology professor in Michigan was using the term in his class, without credit, of course. Deepak Chopra's bestseller, Ageless Body, Timeless Mind, includes passages alluding to the uses of time suspension. Older people will no doubt benefit more and more from ECI therapy, applied as one of our Priests describes in the letter below:

Dear Dr. LaVey,

I have always addressed you as "Dr. LaVey" when speaking to others as a term of respect. However, the title "doctor" seems much more conventional to me at this point.

Both of my parents have suffered from strokes which have left them brain damaged and bitter. My mother, who was once a well-respected and powerful businesswoman, now spends her time watching the weather channel. She Is in almost constant discomfort. I have taken the responsibility of taking care of them until they die so they will never have to be placed in a convalescent hospital and risk abuse by underpaid and frustrated staff. Medical doctors have been unable to do anything to help alleviate her pain and depression except through drugs which leave her lifeless.

About m months ago, I was perusing through The Devil's Notebook and I re-read your chapter of Erotic Crystallization Inertia. Being a psychology major, there is a lot of material at my disposal concerning the effects of one's environment and its influence on human behavior. However, none as clear cut and bullshit-free as yours. Since I have always been interested in off-beat sciences, I decided to set up a "total environment laboratory".

I have collected a lot of furnishings from the 40's and the late 50's, the era when my mother was the most productive and happy. I filled our den with all the furnishings and accessories I could fit, using old photographs of cocktail parties my mother hosted as "maps". I dusted off her old lps, got a new needle for the turntable, stocked the bar, and scented the room with cigarette smoke, green olive juice, and tiny bit of old cologne from my father that I found in the medicine cabinet.

When my mother came to me complaining of a shooting pain in her side, I led her into the den, put on Jackie Gleason's Music, Martinis and Memories, and gave her a seltzer water garnished with a cherry (alcohol would react with her medication) and just started talking with her about what would be appropriate to serve as nibbles for a cocktail party. At first she looked at me strangely, but then the magic kicked in. She relaxed, a smile crept across her face for the first time in months, and her left hand which was left crippled from her stroke loosened enough to grasp a couple of pretzels. She enthusiastically gave me all sorts of tips on hosting an effective business cocktail party.

She was surrounded by all the accouterments of her prime. I have now been slowly changing the house, room by room, and the effects are no less than miraculous. I have given no hint as to exactly what I am doing or why. This has assured me that it ls the physical environment which has catalyzed the change. She even modeled her entire wardrobe of dresses one day and now regularly applies makeup. I cannot thank you enough for devising your concepts of total environments and ECI. I hope that someday you receive all the credit you are due and people stop taking what you have discovered and c1almlng it as their own.

Sincerely,

Church of Satan Priest

Santa Cruz, CA

P.S. It ls truly amazing what can happen when people stop talking and start doing.

Dr. La Vey has some further thoughts on ECI therapy as described below:

WHAT'S NEW?

by Anton LaVey

Most people die from newness. Contrary to the accepted premise of staying young by keeping up on things, newness is a devastating, death-dealing state. Constantly changing standards invalidate life-maintaining stasis. The only way you can get old is by exposure to the new. Each fresh excursion into the contemporary negates that, which if fiercely retained, would continue to provide an ageless state of limbo. If there is no PRESENT to involuntarily match the past against, the past remains the present. And you remain the past present, or, like a vampire, the way you were in your prime.

Many examples have been shown. After Many a Summer Dies the Swan, Corridor of Mirrors, She, The Lost Horizon. What is thought to be "rarefied air", within which the ageless dwell, is but a metaphor for "time standing still".

The pollution of the present is literally deadly poison. Whenever possible, an emissary or liaison must be employed to bring supplies in from the outside world and negotiate business. A seemingly harmless occasional trip outside can contract debilitating radiation sickness, necessitating actual recuperation. Again; the metaphor of the ageless one melting away after leaving its rarefied environment -- sometimes a short passage through a cleft in a mountain pass -- has great validity.

I have personally known individuals who implemented the formula with admirable success. They only succumbed when they were forced to make regular forays into the world without, thus suffering the ensuing debilitation. Two examples were Dr. Nixon and Samson de Brier. Had they had less contact with the outside world and been allowed to exist totally within the confines of their idealized worlds, they might have lived much longer. One thing is certain: like Dorian Grey, neither appeared much older than when he was significantly younger. Strange, how these types never really look as young as they really are in their youth, either. When Dr. Nixon was in his twenties, he appeared to be in his forties. When in his sixties, he appeared to be in his forties.

It helps to avoid seeing people. The old ones are dull, having been divested of meaningful memories which have been replaced with contemporary pap, and physically ugly. The young ones are mentally impoverished, illiterate, and "Typhoid Marys" of contemporary contagion. Both are cultural and aesthetic saboteurs.

Attempts to "enlighten" young persons are noble but depleting. The time and energy spent in attempts to alter the effects of contemporization only subject the bestower of life to the contagion of transitory values. Susceptibility is greater than immunization. If you attempt to provide others with antibodies against the disease of newness, you are fighting the odds. The older one is, the more important conservation of energy becomes.

What about immunity? What does one do to protect oneself if forced into the outside world? The answer is to treat it as any other form of deadly radiation. Heavily tinted glasses likely to turn day into night and ear plugs help. When a seemingly deaf Satanist was loudly asked, "Hard of hearing?", he replied, "No-just tired of listening." I have known old-timers who literally tum down their hearing aids. Some have more trouble "shutting down" than do others. That's why it's best to play it safe and wear a gas mask.

It is a misnomer to assume one must "live in the past". Living in the past is not enough. It becomes a random hodgepodge of stylistic approaches, none of which is a genuine time warp of sufficient emotional intensity. Rather, it is a case of "living in a past"; an era embraced because it, more than any other, represents one's best interests and most vital responses.

If you must know what's going on in the outside world, have a liaison fill you in on only what you need to know. If you are a true candidate for agelessness, there won't be much you will care to know.

A helpful exercise is to keep up on the news-the news, that is, of the time frame you exist within. Keep periodicals at hand to reinforce what's happening in the world. This may entail acquiring a collection of vintage newspapers and magazines, popular books of the period, indigenous musical recordings, etc. If you feel in the least deprived of outside stimulation, the lifestyle is not for you.

Clothing of the period must be as rigidly maintained as a Japanese feudal household. Instead of all shoes being removed at the door, suitable attire must be worn in your presence at ALL times. Nothing shatters the life-sustaining stasis of a time warp more than the countervisuals of contemporary fashion. Loose fitting smocks may be provided at the door, if necessary. (Disney World has already implemented this device in its total environments.) Then, you can imagine your occasional mandatory guests as monks from some compatible religious order-and treat them accordingly.

Conversation must be without any reference to present conditions. It helps to employ the vernacular of the chosen period. Rather than "roll with the punches", pretend that you don't quite understand what your guest is saying, if his speech pattern is invasive. Better to be thought eccentric and difficult to deal with. At best, our visitor will honor your environment with a conducive speech pattern. At worst, he will leave and not return and be poorer for it.

Genuineness and authenticity of artifacts is less important than EFFECT. If ersatz materials and modem reproductive techniques produce a CONVINCINGLY realistic time warp, it matters little that a book is not an original edition, but a replica. What IS important is the content. The fact that you are reading a book that LOOKS like an old copy of Main Street, and IS that very story, places you within the time frame of your vital survival. Just make sure you tear out the omnipresent contemporary postcard insert offering other books in the "Classic Editions" series. If Franklin Mint can convincingly provide, use it! Get the idea?.

Password

This issue's password is an abbreviated version of Robert Ervin Howard's poem, "Recompense". If you're not familiar with Mr. Howard's dark poetry (and darker life-1906-1936), this will give you a taste ofwh~t the man who wrote the "Conan the Barbarian series of books felt in his murky soul.

Selections from RECOMPENSE

by Robert E. Howard

I have not heard lutes beckon me, nor the brazen bugles call,

But once in the dim of a haunted lea I heard the silence fall.

I have not heard the regal drum, nor seen the flags unfurled,

But I have watched the dragons come, fire-eyed, across the world.

I have not seen the standards sweep from keep and castle wall,

But I have seen a woman leap from a dragon's crimson stall,

And I have heard strange surges boom that no man heard before,

And seen a strange black city loom on a mystic night-black shore.

And I have felt the sudden blow of a nameless wind's cold breath,

And watched the grisly pilgrims go that walk the roads of Death,

And I have seen black valleys gape, abysses in the gloom,

And I have fought the deathless Ape that guards the Doors of Doom.

I have not seen the face of Pan, nor mocked the dryad's haste,

But I have trailed a dark-eyed Man across a windy waste.

I have not died as men may die, nor sinned as men have sinned,

But I have reached a misty sky upon a granite wind.